Thursday, January 31, 2008

It’s Great to Have Supportive Females when Your Female Parts Need Support

I was so upset yesterday afternoon that I couldn’t write. I didn’t want to take my frustrations out on you all, so I decided to keep my mouth shut and fingers off the keyboard.

Had the GYN visit yesterday morning and found none of it to be good news. It’s looking like I may have endometriosis or an IUD problem. Basically, my doc is humoring me by letting me get another sonogram (we meet again, Mr. Wand…) to make sure it isn’t a cyst problem (which she – and I now too – doesn’t think it is) before having my IUD removed and a laparoscopy in my lady bits.

I felt so defeated. I know this is a problem I couldn’t have seen coming, isn’t my fault, and is in no way preventable, but I just felt so totally and utterly defeated. After the exam (whilst having my period) yesterday, they tried to get me to go have the sonogram immediately after, but I passed. I HAVE MY PERIOD. Now, I know this is “no big deal” for “medical professionals,” but I already feel bloated and like my junk could fall out at any second, aside from the fact that I’m bleeding, so no, I don’t want the wand experience today. I decided to wait till Monday and instead take the pain pills until then.

After all the aforementioned bullshit, I really didn’t want to go to roller derby practice, but I did. And I’m glad I did. My girls could tell something was wrong as soon as I walked in there, and they asked. I told them about my day, and the amazing thing was that several people overhearing my conversation were like, “Endometriosis? I have that!” and “If you do have it, we can have matching scars!” As stupid as it sounds, it was really comforting to know I’m not alone and that someone was excited about having matching scars with me. Insert big sigh of relief here.

As an aside, I’m absolutely amazed at what I’ve learned regarding the female reproductive organs in the past month or so that I had no idea about before. For instance, did you know that each month a cyst forms on one of your ovaries? I had always thought, “Ok, egg is released by the ovary, travels through the fallopian tube, yadda, yadda…” I assumed the fallopian tube was attached to the ovary, and the eggs just lined up and came out when it was their turn. Not the case. Each month an ovary develops a “follicle,” a fluid-filled sac, that contains the egg that is to be released. It bursts and the egg makes the trek to the fallopian tube. If the follicle doesn’t burst, it’s then called a cyst. Huh. Never knew that. It’s things like these that make me slightly disappointed in the sex education classes of my youth. I truly had a very brief and simplified explanation of my lady bits, and as a near 30-year-old I’m embarrassed that I truly don’t know the actual inner workings of my sex organs.

New blog not about lady bits to come later this afternoon. The topic? Resenting what you’re suppose to love. Discuss! (over some coffee and with a Jewish lady who resembles Mike Myers, of course)


Anonymous said...

I have no idea what happens in my lady bits. I have no idea how an IUD works. I don't understand how my Nuva-Ring works. I don't even know where the pee-hole is. I probably should have paid attention in sex ed instead of giggling.

Meghan said...

My boyfriend was surprised to learn that my pee doesn't come out through my vagina. Seriously.

Cindy Lop-her said...

WOW. Good think Meghan's boyfriend and Betty Beatdown aren't dating...

Julia said...

I'm laughing so hard at this comments page I can barely type.

Sorry to be such a latecomer to your blog, BTW. You're probably going to see a bunch more comments from me on old posts.