Thursday, January 3, 2008

“You’re Gonna Have to Face It, You’re Addicted to…”

Over the holidays I began to read this book about getting rid of addictions, not because I have a silly new year’s resolution, but because I know (and have known) I’m addicted to food, shopping, and excess. I’m sick of blowing all my money on food, wine, and chotchkies. Okay, so maybe not chotchkies, but you get my drift – it’s all crap that I don’t need and that makes me feel guilty after I eat it or buy it – or buy it then eat it.

I’ve noticed though, I’m not the only one with addictions. My 13-year-old car has taken to Chevron gas, and when it doesn’t get Chevron gas, it runs funny. Just like a junkie, in the mornings it sputters and hesitates to go – even though my foot’s on the gas. I’m afraid it’s going to die from this affliction, and I wonder what is in the Chevron gas that keeps it going – is it the Techron? I’ve thought about getting Texaco gas, because it also has Techron in it, but I really don’t want to risk it. Chevron it is.

The book I read was less than satisfying – it talked about restricting meat, nuts, and dairy from your diet and ingesting oils 4 times a day to help rid you of your affliction. That plan sounds like too much for me. How the hell am I suppose to focus on stopping a bad habit AND being a hippie at the same time? I may start requiring Techron too if I was made to do that.

One thing that I did get out of the book was one simple statement about how you view changing your addictive behavior: it’s better to go into ridding an addiction by honestly and sincerely wanting to do something else, or not do it, than it is to have the mindset of “I’m not allowed” or “can’t” do it. Totally true for me. I’m a rebel. Okay, I’m as much of a rebel as a control freak can be, but I don’t like being told I can’t or aren’t allowed to do something. It makes me want it more. So, I’m trying to really evaluate my quality of life and honestly say:

1. I want more money in the bank, so I don’t want to shop as much.
2. I want to be healthy/feel good/look svelte, so I don’t want to consume in excess.

It’s hard to remember these things when I’m presented with wine and cookies or a pair of shoes marked down 70% in my size, but I’m going to try and do it.

As for my car, too bad it can’t think for itself and decide it wants whatever gas is cheapest. It would certainly help me out.

1 comment:

Megan said...

Oh, honey, we need to talk. this blog resonates so true with me right now.