Monday, June 16, 2008

Got Gas?

Yesterday our doorbell rang, and instead of the usual confused delivery person or religious solicitor it was our new next-door neighbors. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned them on here yet…

Our new neighbors bought Mr. Frank’s old house. From what we’ve been told, they’re friends of Mr. Frank’s daughter—the one who hated us because we can’t trim the bushes according to her timeline—and they are fairly conservative and religious, home-schooling all 6 of their children. They moved in the weekend I was at BrewCon, and J has talked to them, but no matter what I do, they ignore me—to the point where I wave and say “hi” and they turn their heads.

Well, you can’t ignore me if I answer the door.

“Hi,” I said, as I held back the dog.

They just stood there. I smiled. They looked at each other. Stood there some more.

The husband finally said, “The gas was siphoned out of our van last night.”

“Really?” I said, “That’s terrible.”

They stood there some more. “Siphoned?” I repeated. “I’m really sorry to hear that.”

They continued to stand there.

“Well,” the husband finally said, “We just wanted to let you know. We just got a locking gas cap.”

“Thank you!” I said. And they left.

“What the hell was that all about,” I thought… “God, they’re weird.” And then it hit me—did they think I siphoned their gas?! What the hell?

Okay, okay, so I have tattoos and multi-colored hair. So J and I aren’t married. So I have roller derby stickers all over my car. That doesn’t mean I don’t deserve the same courtesy and respect as anyone else, and it certainly doesn’t mean I siphoned your gas!

Really, it’s pretty shitty that someone hit up our street and decided to siphon gas. I can only hope the person who did this really needed it, and is using it to get him or her to work. Gas is out of control right now. So are groceries and just about everything else because of the high price of gas. It sucks for all of us, even us tattooed sin-living freaks who make sure your unsupervised kids aren’t playing in the street. It sucks for you that the gas in your van was siphoned, but it sucks even more if you thought I did it. If you were smart, you’d have looked in my car and seen that I’m almost on E, because it’s hard for me to afford gas as well.


Anonymous said...

Jebus H on a sidecar! Your neighbors give "christians" a bad name (as if they don't already have enough PR problems). Perhaps you could highlight some salient passages in a bible and leave it on their stoop!

chrissy said...

holy shit! that is totally should throw a really, really big party, invite us all and pass out bottles of jameson...let them know what kind of decent folks you really are! heehee

Tami said...

I think they are just making you aware maybe?? Our next door neighbor had 140 gallons of gas syphoned out of his boat last weekend. Oh and if you do have a really big party I want to come!